I absent myself from school for the past 3 school days. High fever on tuesday. Mid-fever on wednesday. Low-fever on thursday. No fever on friday! I continued to stay sick by breaking a little rule and indulged myself in the "massive attack"(shared with des). Closed one eye and suffered more later.
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I depended on drowsy medicine to put me to sleep these few days. Not insomnia. I am tired of it and its passionless limbs that drap over my bed in a lethargic state. I love Mummy oh so much! And i really thank God for her! She was there when i was feeling the range from suicide, heartbreak, lose of love, lose of faith and loosing myself. Even when i bit my tongue trying not to say anything. She knew. The dried up tear path on my face gave me away. I clasp tightly in her arms, pouring out everything that i felt. A hole in my heart that needs fixing. Mummy is the best! smiles* All my wants were washed down the drain. But everthing i had, stayed in place. Love memories has traced the outline of every place. For now, time has forgotten me. Yet our memories linger, and love remembers. I am lost. And its definately true that we have to get lost to find ourself. Not all scars show. Not all wounds heal. Another picture to burn?.
Blessings i grant you.
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i'm a mess, and i know it
posted by becks at 10:31 PM
Monday, March 30, 2009
